The Lunatic Fringe of Gun Control

Odd Stuffing
4 min readJun 3, 2019

When it comes to gun control, there is no shortage of bizarre ideas that are supposed to put an end to “gun violence”. With this in mind, I’d like to share with you a couple of my favorite new additions to the mix and their likelihood of success. I present to you speed bumps, flowers and magic!

The first is from a Seattle Councilmember, a member of the Socialist Alternative party, who wants the city to use raised flowerbeds and speed bumps to reduce drive-by shootings in the Central District. Of course, she’s also calling for the standard “common sense gun measures,” which includes banning all semi-automatic firearms. Keep in mind this Councilmember is looking for gun violence reduction measures that do not involve more policing of the areas where it has been occurring.

Apparently the logic behind these ideas is that people who are considering committing murder on a public street will be deterred because they may scrape the bottom of their getaway car on the speed bumps. Likewise, the calming effect of flowers planted along the sides of the streets will induce such a feeling of peace and calmness that the thoughts of murder will be purged from the shooter’s mind.

Of course, speed bumps might have been a good idea years ago when most people drove sedans, but today’s car buyer prefers pickup trucks and SUVs, which have a lot more ground clearance. Speed bumps just aren’t going to be as much deterrence to the modern and trendy drive-by shooter.

Now, it’s hard to argue with bright, colorful flowers being calming. But if beautiful flowers calm, dead flowers may just trigger the opposite reaction. Taking care of these flowers is going to be a stressful job for the new army of city-funded florists.

The raised flowerbeds however are an idea I can get behind, literally. Made with thick wood frames and filled with dirt, they would be a great source of cover from incoming rounds. This will be especially important since the Councilmember doesn’t want additional law enforcement resources in the area. I’m assuming some “duck and cover” training for the residents will come with the new flowerbeds.

Hopefully Chicago, Baltimore and Los Angeles, cities with some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation — the same “smart gun control laws save lives” being pushed everywhere else — will realize the power of speed bumps and raised flowerbeds.

Then we have an anthropology professor at Dartmouth College who claims that magic could influence people to use guns to kill other people. She based this on her studies of street politics, insecurity, and social performance in contemporary urban Haiti. Her own quote is the best way to describe this:

“It would be shortsighted to dismiss these claims as the misguided logic of a ‘superstitious people…That racially inflected trope, long used to marginalize and demonize Haitians, among others, blinds observers to the way in which guns do exhibit a power akin to magic: the power to create a change in someone’s state of mind.”

Folks, I cannot stress this enough. Do NOT let the magic in your firearms turn you into a homicidal maniac. For this very reason, I’ve insisted on having a proper exorcism performed on all of my firearms. Purists — and 1911 shooters — will insist on a Haitian Vodou (Voodoo) priest for this job. Yes, it costs a little bit more but ya know, that peace of mind is worth it.

Okay, enough of that nonsense.

In all seriousness, how do these ideas differ from the other useless theories coming out from gun control zealots? These are the same people who believe putting up a Gun Free Zone sign will actually “repel” homicidal maniacs intent on committing mass murder against defenseless victims.

You want to make people safer? Address the root causes of poverty and crime. Address mental health and treat it like physical health, something society doesn’t scorn and ridicule. Address parenting, morals and respect for others along with the other basic life skills we seem to be ignoring. Address taking responsibility for ones own actions and holding people accountable for what they do. Address punishment for those who actually commit crimes instead of punishing the law-abiding.

There are no easy fixs to societal problems. But instead of doing the hard work, we have nitwits like this and the rest of the gun control groups saying ‘this one law / one new thing will save lives’. And when that fails, it’s another new law that will save lives. And another. And another. And another.

Bob

#oddstuffing, #Constitution, #BillOfRights, #SecondAmendment, #GunControlFails, #LunaticFringe, #SpeedBumpsFlowersMagic,#Voodoo, #RealSolutions, #mewe, #medium, #oddstuffing.com

p.s. In honor of speed bumps, flowers and magic, please enjoy Red Rider’s 1981 hit, Lunatic Fringe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uqUa_G1h3pw

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Odd Stuffing

A weekly commentary on the issues, events and people impacting the Second Amendment community, the state, nation and world.